What I’m realizing now is that I have a long way to go.  It is sad to realize but at least I am getting somewhere.  My first draft had 106 pages.  My second one, hopefully by the time I finish, should be around 150.  I am extremely happy with what I have but the fact still remains, that isn’t enough.

          It is hard to face because part of me says not to push the word count just to push it.  But on the other hand is the reality that for the genre I’m going for, or most adult fiction, my book is so short that it would get passed over easily.  I want to get to 250 but I’m struggling with how to do that.

          At least I am getting there though.   The hard part, coming up with the story, is behind me.  Now I just need to find a way to really make it complete and perfect.

          And of course there is still the matter of a title.  I really, really liked The Beautiful Blood but decided it was way to close to The Lovely Bones so I’m still thinking.  I have post its all over the wall by my bed with ideas.

          At this point, I’m starting to get very excited.  I just finished editting the first five chapters. I am extremely happy with them.  It is funny because all of the sudden I am wanting other people to read it.  Today was the first time since I started that I had that feeling.  There was one line I editted that I just sat back and said, wow, I can’t wait for someone else to read that.  It was such a good feeling.  Pride in your work is important no matter what you do and I feel like in this case it is saying that things are falling into place. 

          I also had a huge realization.  I am not Angelina Jolie nor am I John Green or Kathy Reichs.  I am never going to write something that I think is as life changing as Notes from my Travels, as well written as Paper Towns, or as interesting of a read as Deja Dead.  That is fine.

            But the catch is, none of those writers are going to ever tell the story of Natalia Rizzello like I am.  Plain and simple, they can’t tell the story I am writing like I can.  Absolutely nothing against them but it is true.  It is the same of most books and authors out there.  Like Nicholas Sparks could never write a Harry Potter book as well as J.K. Rowlings even though obviously he is a great author. 

          I’m not trying to say I think I’m this absolutely amazing author or anything but I do honestly feel that I’m doing justice to the story I am telling.

Since I’ve been reading like crazy I’m going to start doing some blogs about books too. If you check out my reading list, you can see exactly what I’ve been reading. I’ll probably go back and write about at least a couple on the ones I’ve read last month. Especially on the book Pledged, I have been meaning to write some things. That was a book that really left me with a lot of thoughts at the end. Maybe I’ll even write on it tonight.

Besides reading like crazy, I have been trying to get into editting my book. I finished the first draft, did a written edit, and am now put corrects in while also doing a second edit. I kind of went through a period of really doubting that I could get anywhere with it but taking a few weeks away, then going back, completely changed my outlook. At this point I’m extremely happy with the way things are sounding. There are some parts that I’m completely in love with which is a great feeling. 2010 is definately going to be the year I become a published author. I have complete faith.

So yeah, reading and writing. Those are my excuses for not blogging but I feel like they are completely legit. Keep checking back for tons of new stuff up soon!

Oh PS, has anyone else seen the new Boondock Saints movies? I LOVED it.

        I came to the realization that I’m tired of not being an author.  I have so many books started yet here  I am going to the same jobs day after day just to get a paycheck.  It is time to get my life all in order and start doing something I truly love.

         At this point I’m still trying to decide if I want to continue one I’m working on or to start with my newest idea.  My idea is to attempt to write about ten pages a day.  I’m going to try my best to power through and not worry too much on editting yet. 

Wish me luck!